Just what I needed

My hands were sweaty, my knees shaking. I don’t know how I managed to park my car, but I did. I was nervous – and late – but I walked in. Smiled and mumbled an apology about being late.

After hearing about the joys of being a member of Junior League of Stamford-Norwalk, I knew I was going to join. Granted, I knew that walking in, but I was afraid I’d chicken out.

You see freaders, I’m not good at people. I mean, I am. I fake it a lot, but in social situations by myself? Not so good. I get incredibly nervous and anxious in situations where I don’t know many people. Seriously, sometimes it’s xanax worthy anxiety.

I often forget to follow up on emails, I tend to be slightly scatterbrained when it comes to remembering names but there I was, in a room full of ladies who wanted the same thing i did. To meet other gals while serving the community.

I can not even begin to tell you how excited I am for this all to start. Within an hour I was all smiles, eager and laughing and engaging in the conversation so I’m pretty excited. I’ll get over this fear of new social situations soon enough, but the way I see it? This is kind of like me giving blood – doing it to get over a fear and make myself a better person while doing so. So go me?

But really, this is what I’ve needed to pull me out of my rut. Something for me, something to give me social interaction. This? Will be good. In addition, this week I’ve applied to countless teaching jobs today and yesterday, I drove to Bridgeport to apply to be a substitute teacher, I spent 3 hours yesterday filling out two applications for two schools and completed my TFA application a week early! It’s been a good week. A very good week indeed.

I am so happy that I finally feel like I’m settling down here, for the past couple months I feel like I’ve been twiddling my thumbs just kind of…being. But now I have something, something for me. The only that could make things better? A nice teaching job at a private school or admission to SHU for grad school or a substitute teaching job. I mean, I don’t think I’m asking for much am I?

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