Day in the Life of a Stay At Home Mom

Life as a stay at home mama is tough.

I’m slightly exaggerating here, but not really. I’m certainly not cut out for it but this is probably also the reason I’m not a Kindergarten teacher. I’m not really good at entertaining children let alone children who don’t talk back and can’t tell you what’s up when the cranky pants are on.

For my friends who wonder what the eff I do all day, well here it is. A while ago, I shared Adam’s day with baby so today, I’m sharing our typical day. (note: Some pictures may have been taken on separate days as seen by the different outfits ;))

6-7am – Wake up Mommy!

Ethan comes into bed and we cuddle while he has his morning bottle. After the bottle, it’s a diaper change and breakfast.

7:30a – breakfast!!! He usually gets an egg or waffle and some cheerios or fruit to add a bit umph. Sometimes we get dressed before breakfast, other times we eat in our jammies. This day, we happened to be dressed at breakfast. That’s consider a win in our book.

8:30a – Play time! We’ll crawl around and see what kind of shenanigans we can get into. This day Ethan was working on pulling himself up on the entertainment center.

 

9:30a – Gym time! I usually workout in the mornings if I go to the gym or the afternoons/earlier mornings if I run. 9:30am spinning is one of my favorite classes at my gym, Ethan goes to play in the day care while i work out.

10-11a (ish) – ends up being Ethan’s nap time. If I go to the gym, we try to get home by 10:30 so we can still hit the nap window. It’s a short window.

Late morning through lunch time…

If we don’t have a play date scheduled, we’ll go run errands and tool around town and sometimes meet Adam for lunch near his work.

But if we do have play group…we play usually play until close to afternoon nap (anytime between 2-3p)

Our favorite playgroups are the Plum Moms Group (earlier this week we tested out My Gym with them!) and our Wednesday coffee group at the mall where Ethan acts like a vacuum cleaner and eats all the puffs and cheerios off the floor. Gross, I know but even if I move him away, he crawls back to them until they’re either cleaned up or some other poor child gets to them.

Mid-Late afternoon…

Also known as post afternoon nap time. We have story time, and we play at home waiting for Adam to get home from work. We crawl around getting into mischief. This is my witching hour so some days I tend to be a bit more hands off and let him explore and have more independent play versus the mornings where I’m super interactive. I try not to, but sometimes…I get tired.

5p-7pm 

Dinner! Bathtime! Daddy gets home (or two days per week goes to class in which case we have all of the sads)! Bedtime!

Some nights dinner is a big hit!

Other nights…not so much.

After dinner comes bath time. If daddy is home, he’ll get in the tub with him in swim trunks and we do bathtime together. Some nights if one of us is out, we go back to the whale tub. Anndd this is what’s been happening lately because homeboy is so squirmy.

After bath time it’s a bottle and story and bed. Then mama gets to enjoy relaxing. I’m in bed by 1030p-11pish after catching up on TV and reading, then it’s lather, rinse, repeat. *sigh*

What do your days look like as a stay at home parent? 

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Postpartum Woes: When Depression Hits

Last week I hit a sort of rock bottom.

I hadn’t really wanted to face anything, I tend to be a bit ostrich like when it comes to having all the feels.

But last week, it was a new low. Even for me.

The never ending feeling of that lump in the back of your throat like you’re just about to burst into tears, the constant napping, the scowling, the moodiness. I just couldn’t explain why. The tears, the lack of motivation. I felt like everything was a burden and about to come crashing down around me. Trying to answer the question “how are you doing?” or “what’s wrong?” was like torture because I couldn’t answer without breaking down.

I don’t have a history of depression and being almost ten months Post Partum, I didn’t think I could get PPD. (Note: I’m not self diagnosing here, I’m contemplating.) But PPD this late is possible, not self diagnosing, but we’re not ruling it out for now until I figure out if it’s a hormonal imbalance with the mini-pill.

I do also know that opening up to hubs and a couple of pals has done eons for me. Maybe it was the polar vortex last week that kept Ethan and I shut in that set off this avalanche of emotions, but really, my ambivalence towards everything I once gave two effs about was just growing and growing and I was getting tired of not caring about anyone. Or myself.

Then of course there was this neverending guilt. The guilt over having all of these feelings that were making me just…not care. Guilt over feeling blase. Guilt over my desire to go back to work (another post, another time); I felt like I was being crushed and I hit my breaking point.

It’s surprisingly easy to not really think things are different. Or notice that you’re on a downward spiral until you hit rock bottom and talk things out with someone and look back and think. Oh. Right. Huh. That all makes a lot more sense now.

But I think the changing hormones from ending nursing, side effects from the mini-pill (which I read is more common than one might think), the winter blahs, the end of my part time job in December all combined to equal a lot of emotional stress that I hadn’t really admitted to.

Talking things out has made me feel better. Talking them out with mamas who get it. Who have been there, makes me feel just a tad less alone. I am forever thankful for my mama pals for their comments, support and advice.

I did stop taking the mini-pill and will be changing up the birth control in the next week or so. I did read that some people had depression like symptoms with the mini pill so it could be just that and maybe I’ll start to feel better sooner, if things don’t change here shortly then I’ll be going to talk to someone because I want – nay, need – to be the best I can be for my family and feeling just…down is not the best version of myself. I’ve talked to my OB and she’s on board with my wait and see approach for now at least. We’ll revisit when I go in for the IUD in a week or two, but for now, I think seeing if it was simply a side effect of the mini pill is the route I want to take for now.

Things have been better this week. I’ve felt better. I’m a bit happier and I’m working on things. Things are looking up and I’m beginning to feel a bit more like myself every day.

Did you have any depression issues after baby? How did you handle them? 

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MommyCon Philly: A Review

Confession: I feel like half my blogging persona is a healthy living blogger – writing about running, eating (pseudo) healthy and other yogi persuits.

The other half embraces the inner mommy blogger in me.

So when some moms in my group planned a trip to Mommy Con in Philly, I jumped. I’d never been to Philly and since it’s close I figured why not. So, even though book club was planned for Saturday morning (whoops?) we still trekked up there after. I should have skipped or rescheduled book club but alas, I’m a chronic over scheduler. All told though, there was no way I was leaving the house at 6am to drive to Philly for a 9am conference start time. Nope. No way.

We stayed right in Center City where the conference was going to be thanks to the outstanding group rate they offered. That they were able to upgrade us to a king from a standard double was a super win. Royal Sonesta Philly for the win.

We headed out to dinner shortly after we got there since we knew we weren’t going to stay out too late and after a little online searching we trekked over to Nodding Head Brewery. Despite it being upstairs, it was surprisingly kiddo friendly and Ethan did great while we ate.

Nodding Head Brew Pub

The food was outstanding. I had a vegetarian puttanesca, and adam had a duck BLT – both were incredible.

bacon blt

Adam’s Duck BLT.

nodding head brewery vegetarian

So many noms. My meal was a polenta puttanesca and was delightfully light and hearty at the same time. I could have done without the olives but m’eh.

If you’re ever in Philly, I highly recommend checking out Nodding Head – it was delicious – both food and beer. So good. We met up with friends of ours for brunch on Sunday AM and though they picked the joint – we ended up back at Nodding Head completely by chance. Brunch? Also delicious!

I digress.

After dinner, we headed back to our hotel which had an Elephant and Castle in the lobby to enjoy a night cap which was ended abruptly. The demon baby came out and did not settle down until almost 11:30. I should note we headed up to our room at 8:30pm. Though it was closer to 10pm when the crib came up but he didn’t end up sleeping in it anyhow and instead crashed in bed between us which was fine since he woke up at 1:30a, 3:30a and 7am.

Sunday morning, I met up with my mama pals bright and early. E-man and I grabbed breakfast in the lobby (no brekky for the conference? Fail #1.)

Mommy Con Philly

The first session was on Baby Wearing. I’m a big fan of my Tula and I really enjoyed the K’tan Breeze
until it got to stress my back too much. But this session? Was sponsored by Becco & Ergo and I felt like it was  “Here’s the Moby, the gemini and the ergo…kbye.” Literally, it lasted ten minutes. Talked briefly about the ages each carrier was good for and that’s it.

The other morning sessions were just okay. Nothing to write home about I didn’t think. I skipped one at 11:30 just before lunch so we could meet up with our pals. When this awesomeness happened. Dualing car seats atop upside down high chairs (who knew you could do that?! Outstanding!!)

We headed back, I skipped a second session on cloth diapering (101! Yes there were two. of the same.) and tried to nap before our late check out. Monstr there in the blue and white had other ideas and decided it was not in fact nap time, and he was going to SCREAM. Hellooooo over stimulation. #mamafail

Eventually we made it back, met up with our mama group, and then this happened. Hello sleeping, happy, baby!

A sleeping baby is a happy baby.

Baby Guy NYC Mommy Con Philly

We saw jessica from the Leaky B@@b who was, simply put, incredbile. The Baby Guy – who was hilarious and did the giveaways. No I didn’t win anything and no I don’t want to talk about it. They also had a great talk on carseat safety which is always helpful. There’s so much information out there but this was super helpful about everything from infant bucket seats to convertibles. Not all in that order but you get the point.

After it was figured out that I didn’t win anything, I met up with the hubs (who kind of just hung out during the day. He saw it as a vacay and had zero interest in the conference) and we popped out to grab a quick dinner at Honey Grow a few blocks from the hotel. Oh em gee, the biggest thing I miss about living in the city is super interesting little joints like this who pride themselves on farm to table. I had a little stir fry and it was deeeeelish.

Of course, after that we had the drive home from hell thanks to an accident in Maryland on I-95. A 2 hour trip took us almost four hours (with a short stop to feed Ethan in Delaware). 45 minutes of screaming later, somewhere in Maryland on 95, homeboy finally fell asleep. But not before I seriously contemplated opening the car door and throwing myself out of it. Into hardly moving traffic. There is nothing worse than a screaming baby in a car. In traffic. Nothing.

Oh em gee.

Thankfully, we finally made it home. We’re all mostly recovered (traumatized I tell you. Trau-ma-tized.) and baby’s sleep regression rolls on into another week. Another week, another hour earlier he wakes up….what’s the difference at this point? Sleep is for babies…other babies.

Overall, Mommy-con was….fun. Mostly because of the people I went with. Would I go again? Ehhh, probably not to Philly. Baltimore or DC, maybe but no where that I would have to stay overnight or drive more than an hour. There was not enough variety in the seminars, the space was too small (did they over sell? I suspect they may have since their facebook page indicates they expected 200-300 and had almost 500 !!!) they ran out of water and snacks (uhhhh….nursing mamas need water yo!), the advertised “shopping” was non-existent and the swag was simply just okay (I like to go to conferences for swag what can I say). Never mind the fact that you have 100+ cranky infants and toddlers in one room – by 3:30p it was getting bad. Ethan was…aside from the earlier incidents a champ. He saved it all for the car ride home though. Of course he did.

That all being said, I paid like $30 for the ticket since our group managed to snag a discount code (thats what happens when you send almost 15 mamas) so I’m not too upset because I had lower expectations anyhow.

Adam and I got a night out of the house, I got to spend some time with my mama pals and that in itself is worth it’s weight in gold.

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