Why is it…student loan lenders don’t understand the term “unemployment?” Don’t they know you can’t get blood from a stone?
Why does it… take so long for interviews to come through after applying for a job (not for me…hubs)
Why is it…I haven’t gotten a phone call from a certain parental unit in over a month?
Why don’t we have a back up for the back up plan?
Why am I not debt free?
Why did I go to such an expensive school that I paid for in student loans?
I’m scared homies. Like, really, legit frightened about life from here on out – not knowing how we’re going to pay rent, not knowing how we’re going to pay credit cards let alone how the EFF we’re going to eat…it’s a scary, scary reality that’s finally showing it’s ugly face.
I generally hate writing about this all…but ultimately, it’s life. It’s my reality and well, reality bites. Working 7 days a week is going to suck in two weeks. But the fact that we’re teetering on the edge of something not good sucks even more.
My mother-in-law has said to me on multiple occasions that she doesn’t know how we’re surviving. How I do it.
Answer, don’t think about it. Thinking about it all makes me want to curl up in a ball and cry. Big fat ugly cry, like snot all over my pillow cry. But really, what’s that going to do for us? It’s not going to solve anything. It’s not going to pay the bills or even buy me a sixer of Magners to ease my worries so why bother? Not worth it, just keep my head down and work hard. Right? Right.
So I apologize if my blog is a little on the slow side, and for this depressing post but I had to write it. Trust me when I say this is not the happily ever after I hoped for when I said I do. This is not the life I thought I’d be living at 27. The light in the dark forest though is hubs, because despite this, and moving to CT for a campaign job that ultimately was a HUGE gamble, is that at least we’re in it together and at least we have each other because without him? I would be in that ball curled up in bed crying.
Sooo….what’s new with you guys?