Just what I needed

My hands were sweaty, my knees shaking. I don’t know how I managed to park my car, but I did. I was nervous – and late – but I walked in. Smiled and mumbled an apology about being late.

After hearing about the joys of being a member of Junior League of Stamford-Norwalk, I knew I was going to join. Granted, I knew that walking in, but I was afraid I’d chicken out.

You see freaders, I’m not good at people. I mean, I am. I fake it a lot, but in social situations by myself? Not so good. I get incredibly nervous and anxious in situations where I don’t know many people. Seriously, sometimes it’s xanax worthy anxiety.

I often forget to follow up on emails, I tend to be slightly scatterbrained when it comes to remembering names but there I was, in a room full of ladies who wanted the same thing i did. To meet other gals while serving the community.

I can not even begin to tell you how excited I am for this all to start. Within an hour I was all smiles, eager and laughing and engaging in the conversation so I’m pretty excited. I’ll get over this fear of new social situations soon enough, but the way I see it? This is kind of like me giving blood – doing it to get over a fear and make myself a better person while doing so. So go me?

But really, this is what I’ve needed to pull me out of my rut. Something for me, something to give me social interaction. This? Will be good. In addition, this week I’ve applied to countless teaching jobs today and yesterday, I drove to Bridgeport to apply to be a substitute teacher, I spent 3 hours yesterday filling out two applications for two schools and completed my TFA application a week early! It’s been a good week. A very good week indeed.

I am so happy that I finally feel like I’m settling down here, for the past couple months I feel like I’ve been twiddling my thumbs just kind of…being. But now I have something, something for me. The only that could make things better? A nice teaching job at a private school or admission to SHU for grad school or a substitute teaching job. I mean, I don’t think I’m asking for much am I?

  • I didn’t know CT had a Junior League and I’ve lived here my entire life! I’m glad you’re enjoying it so far!

    You applied to sub in Bridgeport? You are a brave woman!

    • yep! I just went to the info session last night, there’s another one next week here in stamford, and then provisional classes begin the 19th 🙂 I’m pretty excited! I’ve wanted to join for a while, but i never got around to joining in DC unfortunately.

      I did, but I’ve applied to pretty much every school district between here and bridgeport so that doesn’t say much :/

  • I have the same issues with social anxiety. Not crippling, but it does keep me from throwing myself into new social situations. What if no one likes me? What if I can’t think of anything to say? It’s a lack of confidence and I need to work on it.

    I’ve been thinking about the JL in Philly. Do you mind if I pick your brain a little?

    • absolutely! Keep in mind i’ve only been to an info session, but my provisional classes begin the 19th so I’ll do a weekly post on it. Email me if you have any specific questions 🙂 heidi(at)legallyheidi(dot)com 🙂

  • Anamarie

    Yay!! That’s awesome. I can’t wait to hear about Junior League 😀

    • 🙂 Thanks gal! I can’t wait to write about it!

  • Hooray! 🙂

  • I’m the same way when it comes to solo social situations. Congrats on conquering the event!

  • Mel

    I am just finishing up my first year of JL (LA) and it is a lot of fun. I have made friends outside of the group but its nice to know you have a long standing date with a bunch of girls all aiming to do good for the world. Once you see the requirements for the first year you will understand why I sent you a twitter telling you its a big commitment but if you are up to it its sooo worth it. The nice thing is that if you move again (like I did) you can transfer to other groups. I will probably be joining Orange County JL for next year.

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